something for sherilyn.

i got hurt by you during the wee hours we turned 16 months old.which is incidentally, today.i dknw why i felt the hurt and all that.am i supposed to?

i just want you to know that you go ahead and enjoy the dull monotony of work and the company of your colleagues on such a special day.because i know i will be indulging in that.

blame it on my short term memory you said.or the fact that i never listen to you whenever you try to make a point.and like i alrd said, it's not that i never listen but it's because i choose not to.because me thinks i can change your mind.after all, i'm your boyfriend.that should mean smth right?

but i ain't superman.i can't change the course of mighty rivers.i can't change your mind either especially if your mind is set on smth.i know i know you well enough to know that.

heck i don't even know why i'm writing this at all.

do i feel hurt now?can i even consider how i feel now as being hurt?

maybe.maybe not.i'm just sad that we can't spend our 16th mth together.scheduling conflicts.communication breakdown.i wld like to say that i got hurt when you just put down the phone on me just now.

that's when you said you can't take off day.

i wld like to argue my case here but for what reason?i know you have a solid case to argue back.i know you will say that i have short term memory and cldn't rmbr what i said.or that how i havnt been doing things for you.or how unreasonable/irritating/frustrating i am.

i know i wldn't feel how i feel right now when i go to sleep and wake up later in the morning.the pain would not be there.i would just be thinking how dumb it is of me to feel that way or write what i've just written.

and i wouldn't expect a morning message from you.

because you'll be ignoring me, like you always do whenever we're in such a position.i know you'll miss me because we ain't messaging each other.i know our ego will keep us from msging each other.but in the end i know you'll message back first.because you always do.

you won't exactly say you miss me but i know you do, even though you try to ignore me or attempt to stay angry at me in your messages.if not, why would you bother msging me at all?

and i know inside you might think that the way i express it now, seems like i take this as a game or smth, but it's not.it's just that seeing you that way, just brings a smile to my face.because i know we both are possessive of each other though we don't admit it.you can't bear seeing me with another girl and vice versa.

that's why you'll always come back to me despite all the shit that we've been through.because no one ever made you feel this way before.because no one ever made you feel so loved and cherished before.because no one ever took you to the highest high or brought you to the lowest low.

and because no one can do every little thing like i do.

and i know you'll only see whatever i've written only at night after work.or assuming that you're not working, nahh that's just my wishful thinking.you might go wth and all that, you wld think that i'm a dick as usual.but.

all i'm saying now, even if i do feel hurt or whatsoever.it's numb now.i don't feel it.because listening to green day's 21 guns reminded me of how i made you laugh when i sang it to you ytd afternoon.such moments are priceless, and my love, you're indispensable.

happy 16th month love.